Accept what you can't change, change what you can't accept.

Everyone says the husband gains weight throughout his wife's pregnancy, sympathy weight they call it.  Well for me I did not even gain one single pound, yeay go me....until the baby was born.  Needless to say it has been a downward spiral of destruction since February 24th.  The overeating has gotten out of hand, eating out all time, ordering delivery simply due to convenience, neither of which are bad until you just order whatever it is you want all the time.  I am okay with treating myself occasionally but every single meal gets to be a bit out of hand.  Sometimes we gain weight and even though the scale says so you don't really feel it yet.  I can feel it now, I can feel it is my belly.  I am to that point where my pants are tighter, I feel it when I sit.  Time to get this in check, today.  As of this morning I have convinced myself to get back on the good food bandwagon.  It won't be easy, it never is, but once the decision has been made it's much harder to renege.  I don't want to fail, so putting a goal out there for all to see makes that decision to cheat or give up that much harder.  I am back on track with counting my food, if you bite it, write it, that is my motto starting today!  I easily lose weight when I follow Weight Watchers to the tee, the tricky part is actually following it.  I need to get back to going to meetings and not just occasionally showing up to weight in.  I can no longer accept this path of mediocrity, time for a change, time to shine.  See you on the other side.

Already need a few days rest.

I have been practically back pain free for almost two months...until yesterday.  It started in the morning and I didn't really think much of it, the doctor said it would happen so that's what I thought I was dealing with.  It progressively got worse throughout the day but I still felt like I could go to boot camp, especially after my recent motivational boost within.  So I get to class, start doing what we do and the pain is just too much.  I end up leaving class about 15 minutes early and while I am driving home I remember a recently forgotten memory from yesterday morning of me, while walking around the car parked in the street, completely biting it on the icy pavement.  I mean ass up, flat on my back fall on the ice.  I can't seem to figure out how I blocked this from my memory yesterday other than the fact that it did not hurt at the time, at all.  So now I give it a few days rest and see how I feel, then get right back to it.

You can actually see dudes face bounce of the ground.  Why is seeing people fall so funny?

If opportunity doesn't knock, build a door.

The last ten days or so I have been in a funk.  Actually it is more than that, I have felt utterly unmotivated.  I was going to title this post "Unmotivated" but then I started thinking that is not a strong enough word.  The word I am looking for is "Uninspired".  I have not wanted to do anything other then be home with my family.  I have not worked out, not pushed myself at the office, not payed any attention to my food intake and frankly I have just been going through the motions.  The questions that have been running though my mind have been "why don't I want to workout" and "why don't I feel like working hard".  I don't know the answers to these questions but I have figured out that I cannot wait for inspiration to come to me, I need to go out and get it.

I think that I have actually made myself more lazy just by being lazy the last couple of weeks.  Granted I am still trying to figure out this whole fatherhood thing.  How I can do what I want while still being home for my son and my wife?  I work a long day, I am gone for over 10 hours before I workout.  It's hard to get home at 7 PM and only have two or three hours with my family before we have to start getting to bed so we can be up half the night taking care of a newborn.  I want to be home, I want to relieve my wife who has taken care of Eli all day.  Plus I want time with my son, just me and him.  The hours are limited and I am still working out that balance.  Balance is a great word for this because that is exactly what it is. Finding that balance between what I want personally and what I want for my family.  Laziness is not the answer, neither is waiting around to be inspired, because right now I feel like Beetlejuice when he is waiting for his 9,998,383,750,000 number to be called and they are now serving number 3.  It's time to make my own number 4.

Just sitting around waiting to feel good, or saying I will do that tomorrow does not push you any farther than the other side of the couch.  I am tired of feeling like crap and I have let this "funk" I have been in get the better of me.  It's time to stop feeling sorry for myself and get out there and make a difference.  Motivation and inspiration have escaped me as of late but I am on a quest to go and find them.  I am not sure where this journey will take me but I am finally prepared to start.

I run to add life to my days.

The majority of running I have done in my life has been by myself.  Not because I smell bad after a 5 miler or anything like that it's just that other than running with some peeps in class I don't really have anyone to run with.  My wife has ALWAYS been faster than me so when we run together I slow her down.  There is not much worse than running for an extended period of time at a pace slower than you are able, for really fast runners that slower pace is harder on them than their normal fast pace.  I slow my wife down and I want her to succeed and run as fast as she can all the time so we end up not running together that much.  Yesterday my friend Brent and I went out and ran Burke Lake.  We both run at similar paces and do not despise each others company.  The run was fantastic, it was cool, sprinkling a bit at the and and all around a damn good time.  As we finished the run I looked and Brent and said wow that went by crazy fast.  We ran 4.5 miles, talked just about the entire time, about work, about life, about whatever and literally the time just flew by.  Even today I look back at that run and know that it made my day a little bit better.  Having a partner in crime eliminated the monotony of running alone just listening to your own breathing.  We didn't have music playing, we just chatted it up like a couple of school girls and had a great time.  I think we are going to make this a weekly thing.  Hit boot camp as often as we can but run Burke Lake once a week.

You're only one workout away from a good mood.

It's amazing how much better I feel after just one day of getting back on track.  Yesterday, I ate within my points, I worked out and I feel fantastic.  Yesterday started as one of those "if I am pushed much farther I might go on psychotic murder spree of rage and destruction" days, but I worked though the anxiety and stress and kept telling myself that a good boot camp class was a few hours away would that alleviate all that added tension.  You know what, as much as I hated yesterday, once class ended I didn't even think about the hours earlier in the day, all of that worry literally vanished like a whisper in the wind.  Seeing my family helped with that as well but I contribute most of it to the fact the working out is a stress reliever, possibly the best one I have ever found.  No matter how hard my day is, how much I want it to be over, I am only one workout away from a good mood.  Whether it be a run, a bike ride, a boot camp class, it doesn't matter.  They all work.  Elevating the heart rate, breaking a sweat, those are the only things needed to elevate your mood and break yourself from the shitty day you were having.  We are all going to have bad days, some days are really bad.  Yesterday was a really bad day for me.  Even though I walked into the same issues this morning, I am having an easier time dealing with them because I have lowered my internal stress-o-meter.  Sometimes it bubbles over, and sometimes it fills so tight it explodes, a solid workout drains that stress away and allows me to start new.  I am not saying that it won't fill up again because it will, but at least now I know what to do next time it happens.

I will either find a way, or make one.

I feel confident is saying that the past two weeks have been rather busy.  Family has been in town staying with us, we have had a couple of photo shoots, a few sleepless nights, I have worked all week and what was the last thing...oh yeah we have a baby.  We are working on getting into some kind of rhythm here but we have not found it quite yet.  Luckily Eli sleeps for about 3-4 hours at a time with his most alert hours being from 2 to 4 AM.  So Hila gets up and feeds him, then I wake up and change him and rock him back to sleep so Hila can get back to bed.  The system seems to work and we both do our part.  Even though it is a rather rough hour of the morning, I enjoy this time with him.  It is my time to talk, sing and look at him.  Just me and him.  Man to man.  Father and son.

Remember all that talk about making time, and wasting time well now it's time to put my money where my mouth is and make some time in these crazy days ahead.  See the thing is I have not worked out at all, well I ran Burke Lake one day, but that is it.  Have not eaten well either.  I mean Ben and Jerry's just released new flavors, needless to say those flavors have gotten the better of my judgement as of late.  All of that is coming to a screeching halt after this weekend.  In the next week or so family will start to pack it up and head back to their respective establishments and a sense of normalcy will being to return.  I need to get back to bootcamp, I need to keep up with my fitness and healthy eating.  I am okay with putting something on the back burner for a week or two because of some extenuating circumstances but two weeks is my limit.  I have already had a rough start to the year with my back injury so my fitness level is continuously dropping.  I was considering running the Cherry Blossom 10 miler but with only 4 weeks left to train I am afraid I could not commit to a rigorous training schedule on top of everything else we have going on.  I have quite a bit on my plate right now and that might be too much, I also don't want to unnecessarily take away time from my family.  Bootcamp, running, writing class, work, fatherhood, husbandhood, that's a lot of hats to wear at one time.  Instead of juggling them all and dropping one every now and then I need to find a hat the fits for all scenario's.  I need to find a happy medium, it cannot be all or nothing.  This will take some time and some hard work to figure it all out but I will.  Either I will find a way or I will make one.  That's just how I do.

We make plans and God laughs.

Eli Giora DeLong born 5:15 PM on February 24th weighing 6 lbs. 13 oz. and measuring 19" long.  Instead of sticking to the plan and joining us in late March he decided to grace us with his presence a whopping three and half weeks early.  Luckily we were as prepared as we could be which is not at all.  Bathrooms and nursery were complete but really how do you prepare for something like this?  I received the call around 10 AM on Monday while I was at work that Hila's water broke so I left work and met Hila and her mom at the hospital.  By 4 PM she was fully dilated, started pushing an hour later and in a matter of minutes we were holding a beautiful baby boy.  Even though he was born early he was not considered premature and has passed all his baby tests with flying colors.  Both Hila and Eli are perfectly healthy and doing very well.  We decided to not find out the sex of the baby so needless to say seeing that we were having a boy was beyond emotional for me.  I have never felt more blessed in my life, as a father to look into my son's eyes for the first time and tell him I love him has been one of the most amazing moments in my entire life.  I cannot wait to do it everyday until the day I die.

We were released from the hospital on Wednesday afternoon and have been home since.  I am only able to take off a limited time from work so unfortunately I need to be back in the office on Monday.  I cannot stress about this limited time off but at least Hila is off for the next six months.  I will miss him and his mom but luckily work is only an eight hour day.

Thank you to everyone who has come by with lunch or dinner, or stopped in for a visit in the hospital.  We are blessed to have such a great group of friends.

I have been lucky enough to do many interesting things in my life, I have traveled the globe, scuba dived in the Great Barrier Reef, eaten scorpions in the streets of China, floated in the salty water of the Dead Sea, jumped out of an airplane for no apparent reason but never in my life have I been more excited to start this new adventure with my wife and son, the adventure of parenthood.

This is my baby picture, as you can see there is a remarkable resemblance between father and son!!

Pyramid day.

A couple of days of upper body this week, push ups, dive bombers, chest press and such makes the simplest task a bit more difficult.  Like driving home, like shampooing your hair, or reaching for the alarm clock at 5:15 in the morning.  Add in last night's workout, pyramid leg day and holy hell I don't know how I am going to get up from my desk.  Let me paint a picture for you.  Stand up and do 20 squats, stick you butt out, keep you knees over your toes and your back straight.  Rest.  Now do 30, rest for 30 seconds.  Now do 40, then 50, then 40 then 30 then 20 more.  Go ahead, I'll wait...

Done?  Okay, so you just did 230 squats, well done.  That was just one of the leg exercises we did yesterday.  Add in a squat pulse pyramid, some sprinting, which may well have been a three legged race because that is about how well our legs were moving, a bicep curl pyramid, a military press pyramid and a couple of sets of two minute ab exercises.  Yeah....the stairs in my office are going to be a real challenge today...

Exercise is the most underutilized antidepressant.

Yesterday was a hard day for me.  I have some issues on a couple of my projects and they seemed to come to a head yesterday morning resulting in a rather unpleasant afternoon.  From about 10 AM on I was pretty much just pissed off.  I was angry with a coworker, I found myself being lazy and unproductive, I wanted to eat the mound of cookies and brownies we have sitting in the pantry, I just honestly no longer wanted to deal with anyone or anything.  I was letting my feelings and emotions get the better of me.  At one point I mentioned to my wife that I was "done with today".  That is exactly how I felt, just plain done.  I had a hard time sleeping the previous night, and on top of the stress from work I just more or less had a miserable day.  Anyone who knows me knows that is not typical for me.  If anything I am probably too easy going at times and I try not to let the small stuff get me down.  Yesterday that was simply not the case.  Finally 4:30 rolls around and I head out to go to class, eyes heavy, and the laziness continuing to take root.  All of this forgotten on the first warm up lap of class.  Literally gone.  My trainer Tom even asked me what was so funny because even though I was getting my hind end handed to me I was smiling from ear to ear.  You know now that I think about it, I was just plain happy, truly happy.  I had stopped thinking about work, and just devoted my time and energy to a good solid workout.  As much as work was weighing heavy on my mind yesterday, from the moment that class started until the moment I came in this morning work did not once even enter the proximity of my mind.  Six hours of hell immediately alleviated by one hour of exercise resulting in twelve hours of absolute peace.  Even if the stress from work starts to build up again today, I know I have another miracle hour awaiting my attendance tonight.  I find comfort in that one thought alone.

Thank you Tom, this was exactly what I needed today!

Time is precious, waste it wisely.

I have written about this topic previously but something came up last night and I wanted to expand further.  I was asked how I find the time to write this blog every day.  For me it was an easy question to answer, I make the time.  The process that gradually brought me to this answer was a bit more difficult.  This not only applies to the blog but to many other aspects of my life.  Two of which seem to make people ask the same question above.  Reading and working out.  I do an extensive amount of both.  Before I started reading, writing, and working out I actually thought I was busy.  Now I have no idea what I did with my time before.  Let me explain.

I read about a book a week.  Sometimes more sometimes less but that is the average.  How do I find the time to read so often, you ask?  Easy, I make time.  Sometimes a book is so good I get up early, drive to work and just sit in the car and read for a half an hour.  Do that twice a week and that is a solid hour of absolute silence to just read.  Often times I take my lunch break and drive to the same spot and read for the whole hour.  Let's say I do that twice a week.  With these two simple weekly modifications I have just freed up two whole hours of time to read.  I made time for something I wanted.  All I "lost" was a few minutes of sleep and a lunch hour that I probably would have just worked through anyway.  I have also eliminated television from my personal life.  Yes, I watch several shows with my wife, but if I am home alone the TV just no longer gets turned on.  I am more interested in the book I am reading or could be reading than the mindless dribble that is on TV these days.  Come and see me if you think a particular TV show is better than a book, I can show you some books that will literally change you life.

The same applies to writing as well.  This is something I want to do so I sacrifice other things less important to me.  Sleep, free time and lunch breaks.  Yes, sometimes that means I end up working late or coming in early but how important are these others things compared to what I really want?  I find them to be significantly less important to me the more I give them up.

As I said this has not been an easy process but at no point have I felt that I was missing out on anything.  In all reality I feel have only gained.  I am learning to be a better writer, I have read some mind blowing, fantastically amazing books.  I have rearranged my schedule for the past few years to make sure I get in a workout.  Boot camp has been that answer for me when it comes to fitness.  Nothing else has worked, no gym, no spin class, nothing.  I needed the structure, I needed the discipline.  I needed to take my head out of the equation, to do that I needed to put my heart into it instead.  I stopped making excuses and started making it the way.  Now, working out has simply become part of my routine.  Of course I want to go home and sit on the couch and relax and get to bed early and sleep in.  I want all of these things very badly, but I want something else even more.  I want to be in shape, not just in shape, I actually want to be the best.  I have a drive in me that pushes me to succeed, it gives me that extra motivation/desire/strength/want/need to run faster, to push just a little bit harder.  I have had several obstacles placed in front of me keeping me from being the best.  But no obstacle is so big that I cannot jump over it, run around it, or just climb over the damn thing.

All the obstacles in life, whether they be sleep, time, a torn rotator cuff, or any other of the endless list of things that get in our way, are simply just obstacles to be overcome.  Time, is an obstacle that we will always face, all day, everyday, the key is to stop trying to find time and start making time.  The time is there, the hard part is figuring out how you want to fill it.

If at first you don't succeed...

Thank you Tom for the absolute butt kicking last night.  This time yesterday I was thinking how lovely it would be to not be able to move at work tomorrow.  Hey look at that success!!  I set out to do something and I did it.  I cannot move today at all and it's not quite 10 yet.  Imagine how successful I will feel this afternoon when the soreness has really settled in.  I am hoping to be curled up in a ball under my desk pulling a super sweet George Costanza, with my alarm clock and all.

Unfortunately, no workout tonight, I have my writing class.  I so look forward to this class each week and with last week's class being cancelled we should have twice the fun getting our creative writing juices flowing tonight.  Maybe after a few re-reads and edits I will find a way to make that last sentence sound less dirty.  We have only written one assignment so far and feel I wrote an excellent little story, we will see how the rest of the assignments go in the coming weeks.  After speaking with the instructor one evening I asked if she was willing to edit my Clydesdale story for me, even though it had already been submitted.  She agreed and said it was "not half bad".  This coming from a professional writer and me never having written anything of substance before, I absolutely take that as a great compliment!!  One day with some extra time I will make the edits and changes we spoke of and post it again on the blog.  I did find out that I was unfortunately not the winner of the Dirt Rag Magazine Literature Contest, the issue with the winning story was released this month (yes, the winning story was pretty damn good).  Stupid good-for-nothing judges...  Oh well, next year I will try try again!

Happy Valentine's Day!!!

How I cherish the absolute joy of a midweek day off.  Slept in, read, lounged around the house, and loved every minute of it.  Plan was to get in a basement workout, maybe 5-4-3-2-1 or something of sort, Tom actually emailed out the 250 of each workout for us to try at home if we wanted to.  Like I said that was the plan, until I spent two frickin hours shoveling snow.  Of course my back started bothering me and right at the moment when I thought I could do no more, the angels from two doors down came and helped.  I was so thankful, I was to the point where I felt like I was going to hurt myself if I pushed (well lifted) much more. Thank you neighbors, you saved the day.

Well it's Valentine's Day and we have a lovely evening planned just staying at home.  A little staycation if you will.  We normally go out to dinner but being as busy as we have been and the fact that the beauty who sleeps next to me is a whopping 35 weeks preggers we have decided to take it easy and stay home.  There is just something about a relaxing night in with a movie.  So looking forward to it!

Knowing the impending Snowmageddon was coming Wednesday night, I stayed late at work for a few hours to make sure everything was handled since the likelihood of being off Thursday was well...likely. Translation - No workout Wednesday night.  Just me and my soreness.  Now after shoveling yesterday the soreness continues.  Until tonight that is when Hila and I do a little home workout of our own ;)...easy people, I am talking about an actual workout, now get your minds out of the gutter.  We want to at least do a little bit of a workout before we pull up to our in home dinner theater for the night.  Must find that Friday evening, Valentine's Day motivation, and it will not be easy.  Wish us luck.

Happy Valentine's Day to all.  Kiss your loved ones, hug a friend, smile at a stranger.  Just don't mix up the order here, you will find yourself in a very awkward situation if you go around kissing a bunch strangers...

Sore today strong tomorrow.

Beep, beep, beep.  The alarm blares as he rolls over and reaches for the snooze button.  To snooze for nine more minutes may be the most important thing in the world at this moment.  His arm though seems shorter and stiff, harder to move the way he intends.  With much effort he finds the snooze button and his mind begins the confused thinking of why his arm seems different.  Drifting off to sleep he tries to re-position himself to find that warm spot in the bed, only to find that his legs also are not moving as they should.  As his mind continues to wander, now past the point of being able to sleep, he decides to get up and start the day.  Sitting up seems impossible though, his legs not the valiant trunks they once were, his abs screaming as if they are being used for the first time.  With a slight moan and a few cracks as the bones adjust themselves, he stands and begins to stumble to the bathroom.  The cracks and moans continue as he makes his way from the bed and his mind begins to remember why he feels this way.  He is reminded of the previous evening's events that have lead him to this present moment of pain.  He is reminded of the feeling of using his arms, his abs, his legs, his back for the first time in weeks.  Rubbing the sleep from his eyes he remembers going to bootcamp last night and thinking he could run sprints with the big boys in the freezing cold.  The memory of the push ups pushes its way to the surface his brain, the pain in his chest and arms immediately apparent.  Warming up the shower never seemed like a better idea.  Stepping in, the whole shower steaming, water as hot as he can take it, instantly soothing his muscles.  He knows the day will be rough, slow going, and come evening, snow or not, he gets to do it all over again.  Not a hot shower, not a full day of stretching, not all the time in the world soothes sore muscles like another workout.

Good to be back.

It's official, first sweat broken of the New Year, oh how glorious it was.  Some back story first.  Damn garage door broke on Sunday.  The huge spring snapped in half and when it broke the whole house shook like the crazy neighbor lady drove into the side of the house, scared the bejesus out of us.  Anyway, repair man came yesterday, fixed it and installed a silent belt drive garage door opener.  The joy of that silence is overwhelming, there is no longer the sound of a freight train running through the left side of the house every time the door is opened or closed.  Of course the garage is right below the nursery so we wanted to get this replaced anyway, things really do have a way of working themselves out don't they?  Where was I going with all this, oh yes, yesterday.  Due to the time constraint combination of meeting the pediatrician, Northern Virginia traffic, and a repair man being at the house, I had just about 32 minutes to run, change and get out of the house.  So I skipped the gym, and the warmth therein and ran outside.  I bundled up, hit the streets and did a quick three miler.  Holy frozen lungs.  Just like riding a bike, except no bike and takes a bit longer.  Not going to lie, I felt great.  I needed a run, I needed to sweat and I loved it.  Unfortunately I can't do any kind of workout tonight since Tuesday is my writing class night but I should be back to class tomorrow.  I am already looking forward to that feeling after a good solid workout.  It is like no other.

Time to get to work!

Not quite the start to the week I was hoping for but I will make it work.  The plan was to make it back to class tonight but I forgot that we had scheduled a "meet the new pediatrician" appointment tonight, smack dab in the middle of class.  Oh well, gym instead.  I am thinking three mile run and then some core strength training (excellent suggestion Bill, thank you).  At least it will be warm in the gym!  That reminds me, I need to charge my iPod.

All my excuses for the past six weeks have ended.  No more construction in the house, baby shower is over, holidays have come and gone, back issue is resolved for the time being.  Life is back to normal finally.  That means no more BS, no more lame excuses.  No more "hey is Saturday so lets go out to lunch and then order  in dinner."  No more pizza for lunch, no more late night snacking.  It has gotten a bit out of hand these last few weeks but no more my friends.  Hila has sent me off with an amazing breakfast, soup and sandwich for lunch and some healthy snacks.  I am ready to get back to it.

I wish it were easy for me to find some kind of middle ground with eating.  It is all or nothing it seems, I either am all in or it's sayonara sucka, and I don't really know why.  You would think that while I could not workout I would be even more mindful of what I was eating.  Not so much, I just pretty much stopped paying attention entirely.  I have not been to a weigh in for about two months.  There is a weigh in tonight, if we have time after meeting the pediatrician I will go.  It's time.  I need to make myself accountable, otherwise I will just continue down this same path of mediocrity.  Time to shine folks.  We have no more than five or six weeks left before our lives are completely different with Baby D coming, I want to make the best of the time left.  I will go to the gym, I will eat better, I will get back into shape.  Believe me when I tell you that two months off  from working out is a long time.  It will be tough but I am ready.  I've been ready for weeks, I have just been lazy.  Not lying on the couch lazy, but lazy in my efforts to be healthy.  That time has come and gone.  Time to get to work!

I'm baaaaaaaack!!!!

I just met with the good doctors over at Commonwealth Orthopedic and go figure, after all this wondering, misery, self wallowing, and just plain bitching, my therapy is simple...exercise.  Exercise is the best medicine, as they say.  I only wish I could have received this information weeks ago.  To quote the good doctor, "There will be pain, but push through the pain and I assure you, this will get better."  Best possible news ever!  I could not be more excited about this.  I have been wondering what the treatment would be, a shot, physical therapy, surgery, and all along I just needed to get myself back in the game.  Of course, as with most issues, there is the possibility of needing additional treatment, a 15% chance actually.  I like the odds though, they are definitely in my favor.  So from this point forward it is on like Donkey Kong.

I have paid zero attention to food, exercise or physical activity of any kind.  Those days have come to an end my friends.  Back to life, back to reality.  Thank God actually, I cannot wait to get in a good workout.  My plan for the coming weeks...

Boom.

Thankful.

The past 96 hours have been rough.  Woke up Saturday morning sick as a dog.  Felt it in my body first and then in my head.  Slept, read, ate soup, fell back asleep, missed work, ate soup, slept, woke up and now it's Wednesday morning.  I am now back to work and feeling a bit better.  We also still have construction workers in our house so its hard to rest when it sounds like an old school Batman movie.  <POW> *BOOM*, but I made it work regardless.  One more week and they are gone anyway, and we will have another new bathroom.  I cannot express how happy I will be to have all this construction complete and behind us.  It has been a lot to deal with on top of all the other issues at hand.

This weekend Hila hooked me up with some "Jewish penicillin", homemade chicken soup.  Literally does wonders for the mind and body.  I have had soup for just about every meal for 4 days and it has been glorious.  Nothing like some hot chicken soup when you don't feel well.

On the bright side while being home sick I was able put down about two and half books, that is never a bad thing.  One of them, Phoenix Island, crazy good, check it out.

I still cannot workout and no updates yet on getting into the doc any sooner.  The worst part about all this is that fact that I have no clue what I am supposed to do.  I am a planner and I like to know what is going on with things.  Being in the dark on something, especially when it pertains to my body is quite troubling.  All I can do it deal with it and try to keep the stress at bay.  If I am being completely honest, that is not easy to do.  Luckily I have a wife who happens to love me, and is there when I need a shoulder.  She is, has been and will be my sanity.  I would be lost without her.  Whether it's work, life, love, stress, illness or injury, she is my rock, and for that I am Thankful.

Official diagnosis is...

A herniated disk between L4 and L5 vertebrae.  What does that mean, you say??  I'll tell you....I have no friggin clue.  I have made an appointment with a orthopedic specialist but am unable to get in until February 7th.  Until then I am pretty much in the dark.  I don't know if working out can aggravate the disc more, if I can make it worse, if working out is okay and I just have to deal with the pain.  Frankly, I just don't know.  I am reading some online but who knows how much of this applies to me.  My doctor is just reading a report given to them from the MRI peeps with instructions to see a specialist.  So now I wait another two weeks, dealing with the pain and I guess not working out.

I have watched about a hundred videos on YouTube and this one seems to be the best explanation on what is physically going on inside of me.

Here is another video but I cannot get the video embedded into the blog.
http://www.spine-health.com/video/lumbar-herniated-disc-video

I guess I wait and try to get an earlier appointment.  Any one else dealt with this issue?  What should I expect?  Any suggestions on exercises?  None at all?

Relaxed, refreshed, rejuvenated.

What an amazing weekend.  We finally got in some much needed relax time.  Of course where we were in MD it snowed the entire time and now we come home to even more snow.  It has snowed on me every day since Friday.  About eight inches there and about eight inched here.  Only January and I am already just about snowed out.  If it's going to snow at least snow two feet so I could be snowed in!

Our room at the B&B.  A little slice of heaven.

I should be getting the MRI results in today, I called yesterday and no one has yet to return my call.  A bit frustrating but with my newly found sense of euphoria (see above) I keeping calm.  I have been just about pain free for going on five days now...until today.  On our babymoon we both had massages, and oh how magical it was.  The masseuse came up to me afterwards and said she could tell something was messed up in my lower back.  I think it's kind of amazing that she was able to pinpoint the exact location of my pain just by massaging my muscles.  That massage, along with a nice hot soak in the hot tub helped my aching body tremendously.  I was like warm butter sitting next to the fireplace in our room afterwards watching Sons of Anarchy (I know I am like five years late but holy moly that show is crazy good, we are hooked).  I am not sure if I ended up doing something to aggravate my back today or if I am just given a few days peace at a time.  I hope the doc calls today and we can once and for all figure out this back business so I can finally get back to business!

After a gluttonous weekend of eating Bed and Breakfast breakfasts, lunches out and one extremely nice fine dining meal, I am back on track in full effect.  Stocked up at the grocery store, along with all the other crazies before the storm and am all set with good, healthy meals for the week.  Homemade soup and sandwiches with lean turkey and whole grain bread for lunches.  Hila the brain genius has started making some crock pot meals, last night was a balsamic soy pork tenderloin, yum.  The idea here is to make a meal, eat it, then freeze some left overs for when Baby D decides to grace us with his/her presence.  One less hour in the kitchen then, means one more hour to hold this little wonder of delight in our arms.

Here is a Diptic pic of our meal at Lautrec.  Fantastic meal, the sommelier needs a small beating over the head with a soup ladle but otherwise an absolutely fantastic dinner.  Never a terrible night sitting across the table from this beauty!!  (Oh, on a side note, you are never going to believe this but the chef for the restaurant is a Mrs. Buttersworth...you can't make this stuff up!)

I have now started packing a gym bag for that day when I feel either good enough to go workout/swim/incline walk at the gym and another bag of cold weather gear if/when I decide to head back to class.  The way I am feeling today I am thinking boot camp is at least another week away but tomorrow may be a most excellent day indeed for a swim.

Focus for this week is yet again food.  Stick to my points, all week and weekend long.  Weekend being the hard part of course.  Make it to the weigh in on Monday night and hope for a zero pound weight gain since my last weigh in on December 2nd, I weighed in at 211.8 pounds that night.  I will be happy with a zero since that will mean over the holidays I did not gain weight.  Not easy to do these days!

Sand, X-ray, babymoon.

Counting food intake - 47 points
Relaxing night at home - yes please
Staying up half the night reading Sand by Hugh Howey - Priceless

That is what my yesterday consisted of.  Wanted to get to bed early, its been an exhausting few days, oh the wonder that is life.  While I did get to bed early, I ended up getting into the nitty gritty (get it...sand) of this book and spent half the night finishing it.  Well worth it my friends, well worth it indeed.

Today will be much of the same.  Relax, read, rest back.  Actually today I am not in excruciating pain, yeay go me.  I lasted until about 1 PM yesterday before I could not take it anymore and took my meds.  X-ray results are already in and are negative, as expected.  Tomorrow I have an MRI.  This should show us what we need to know.  Finally getting somewhere with all this.  Next step fixing it.

Focus for this evening is on food.  I have counted all day today and all day yesterday.  Keep this going all week and that will be something.  This weekend we are off to a B&B with absolutely zero control over what we will be eating for at least one meal a day.  Just need to make sure we make smart choices during lunches and maybe enjoy ourselves during dinner.  This is our babymoon, so we will need to enjoy the time we have left, just the two of us.  In just over nine weeks, it will always be the three of us (and Chow).  Wait a minute, if we have a girl that means it will be me and three females in the house.  What have I gotten myself into...??