I want to see what happens if I don't.

Bobby - 2, Runs - 0. Killed it again last night, another non-stop 4.5 mile run. You know, as hot as it was last night the run felt a little easier, well until the last mile. The last mile about killed me but I felt great until then. Definitely had to dig deep last night to keep running the last few hundred yards. For the first three plus miles all I could hear (other then my iPod) was that little white angel helping me along, "Go, Bobby, go!!", and then damn you last mile because the little devil took the microphone and kicked the angel to the curb, "Go ahead stop, it will feel sooo good." It would have felt great to stop because I was exhausted and I had been running in 93 degree heat for 40 some minutes but giving up would never feel as good as knowing I ran the whole thing. Pain is temporary, but the quitting would stick with me much longer. I kept thinking about my wife, how strong she is, how she motives me so much, how much I wanted to tell her that I did it again, that I ran without stopping. I wanted the high five she hits me with as soon as I walk in the house with that smile on my face, the smile of accomplishment. For the last bit of the run, it was her voice in my head that helped me when the going got real tough. Instead of following the old Bobby path of making excuses why I couldn't, I looked for reasons why I could. I just decided to focus on finishing instead of thinking about why I should stop. I already know what giving up feels like, I want to see what happens if I don't.

I am a runner.

Run one for the week done and done. I think I have run Burke Lake something like twelve times in the last couple of weeks. Twice I have been able to do it without walking, oh I'm sorry, make that three times after last night, BOOYAH!! Let's get something straight right off the bat, I don't feel like I have ever been a runner, it's not something that has agreed with me very much. It's hard for me to run, always has been. I do think running is absolutely necessary though in order to be physically fit, it's pretty much a yard stick for me on how fit someone actually is. You may have the biggest bulging biceps in the world but that does not mean you can run a mile without stopping. I have found that running is an incredibly useful tool in regards to health, fitness, and all around well being. I finished the run last night and while I was tired, I felt fantastic. A runners high. All the stress of the day was gone, work was completely forgotten, and I was even more excited to be home with my family. Maybe I am a runner, I may not love the act of running but I love everything that follows. I am not a fast runner so maybe in my head I think that I need to be able to run a six minute mile consistently to be a runner. The fact of the matter is, I went out and ran. I put one foot in front of the other, over and and over and over again. That makes me a runner. I may not be the fastest but still I am a runner. A twelve minute mile is just as far as a six minute mile. Tonight I will try to run the lake again without stopping. I will try to do it a little bit faster. I will focus on the end of the run rather than the moment itself when it hurts. Funny thing about a run is that they all end, yes it may hurt but it will end. I'll crank up the iPod, I'll push harder, I'll know the end is in sight. I will do this, I am a runner.